Day Three: I Ate Bob
Bob is the office jerk.
He's standing right in front of my desk right now, leaning against a file cabinet, drinking coffee from a disposable Poker cup. He gets up now and then and walks back and forth in front of me, talking about shit like "back in those days we didn't have fax machines" and "those were the good ol' days when we could get away with..." and "it took me 20 years to stop craving cigarettes" and I basically just want to take my heavy duty Swingline to his eyeballs over and over until he loses all capacity to bother me.
posted by Lydia | 3:58 PM
7 Comments:
When our annoying office guy swings by my desk I find it's a good time to run and get a cup of coffee, or use the restroom, or wander around the offic until he leaves. He doesn't get hints and seems to have endless time, so this is apparently the only way to get work done.
Aaaaaah, Swingline, how we love thee! In a pyro's hammy fists on Office Space and encased in lemon jelly (jello, amerikuns) on The Office. And now coming to a cranium near you. Can't wait!
(I am Honest + Popular and I approved this comment.)
You must have speakers on your computer to fully appreciate this advice.
Swing wide, Lyds. Hehe.
I have a lovely mental image of a guy in a thin, short sleeve button up with eyes bristling with staples. hehe macabre.
Has anyone seen my stapler?
YES!! YEAH!! And then could you staple his eyes shut and maybe put a coulple in his nostrils, yeah yeah, and then you could just staple and staple and staple until hiswholeheadlookeslikethatguyfromHellraiserohhohhyeahandfoldhisearsdownandsealthemtooyeahbloodbloodpain...ahhhhh!!!!!!!!
Makes me wonder what you're perched on and what you're waiting for... >:/
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